Thoughts on Recent Anime Trends.

I'm finding it a touch annoying that half of the stuff getting posted is crappy anime drawings. No wonder my stuff ends up on page 15 after 5 minutes. I've been here two days and I've already found something to be annoyed about, how typical!

-Someone on DeviantArt

Sadly, I think I have arrived to the point where I, to a degree, agree.

I love the anime art style. I adore it. I love the variations within the style and the style's ability to combine simplistic cuteness with overwhelming, cutting-edge detail. I enjoy the range of emotions it permits and I just love looking at the multitude of character designs out there.

However, I also feel that many artists, especially novice artists, also use the style as a shortcut and a crutch. I myself have even fallen into the cycle of recycling the same faces over and over again. And this tendency eclipses the true masterworks out there and degrades the style. Now, a lot of people think it's just trendy or too simple or too "easy." Creating something is always easy; the hard part is, I think, convincing people that it is art. That's it's interesting or ground-breaking or original or revealing. I believe people should do whatever it takes to be an artist, but falling into a cookie cut, mix-and-match style will run into into a plateau. I always try to break into a new style; once I see that I've fallen into a "trap," I try to find a new style. I've gone through so many. @_@; And I'm still trying. But not doing so degrades the style and belittles highly talented artists who prefer to stay in it.

It's not just novice artists either: I can hardly watch new series now because many of them look too "cookie-cut." There's not much new, innovative stuff anymore and it's sad, really. Because of anime's worldwide popularity, I think many of these people whip up series to make money. Many series have potential but they do not fully utilize that potential. A lot of recent shows seem so half-assed. And I miss hand-painted cels a LOT for some reason, The insanely saturated colors sting my eyes. :P There aren't anymore good sci-fi series anymore. No characters that break the mold. It almost feels like almost every new character out there is a clone of some anime archetype.

Sigh. Where have all the good animes gone? ;.;

In other news, I am returning to Deviantart myself.

Frustration.

Sometimes, I like to simplify solutions to all of my problems. I am always trying to unravel the root of my problems and thus, find ways to elliminate it. I think my problems come from two sources: being jobless and having a mom.

'Course, if I HAD a job, I could make steps torwards moving out, away from my mom, so in the most simplistic terms, all I need is a job-- or rather, all I need is money, money, money.

But still, my mom has been the root of all my problems: my insecurities about my looks, my capabilities, my potential, this ungodly timidity about my future, my paralyzing, life altering guilt, my horrible procrastination habit, my tendency to avoid problems, my shyness, my severe self-criticism, my trust issues, my fear of being alone, my irritability, my difficulty with confrontation ..

... just to name a few.

I re-realized this after a week of total calm and peace from fasting when I came home and got hit in the palce with stress, stress, stress. First, she slaps an overdue tuition bill in front of me and yells at me about it. I tried to explain to her the reason why I didn't worry about it prior to the bill was because someone from my financial aid office actually told me, verbatim that I was okay and there was nothing else left that I had to do. SHe then proceeded to throw a tantrum, like an ACTUAL tantrum-- ever seen a 6-year-old with bipolar disorder? It's scary stuff. Oh yeah, then she gave me ALL these errands right when I came home; mind you, I came home at 1AM. I had to call about deals on this Vonage plan or whatever, check over some FAFSA stuff, look over tax crap and do this and that for her ... God, I don't even know ANYTHING about taxes or loans or whatever and she expects me to be her little encyclopedia for this stuff. Hasn't she done this the whole time? Why does she need this from me now? I'm tired of this.

I probably wouldn't have put such a major block on her if she hadn't thrown all of this at me right when I stepped through the door. BEFORE I even stepped in, actually. This is why I leave my house so often. I want to get away from her. And she is so determined that she's good for me. That's the part I hate the most, that she believes she is so good and innocent. What a hypocrite. No wonder I'm so messed up now. How can anyone grow up normal or stable with her?

I realize now I have been putting all my efforts into trying to undo everything she's done to me ...

All the counseling, all the self-help books, all the research, the sudden interest in psychology in 11th grade, the soul-searching, all of that ...

.. is to totally correct my upbringing.